Wisdom is something many of us desire, but how can we truly cultivate it? What does it even mean to be wise, and how can we recognize those qualities in ourselves? In this excerpt from Just One Heart, Dr. Jonathan Fisher, a cardiologist, explores how tuning into the body can help us cultivate the wisdom of our emotional heart.
As a cardiologist, I’ve treated over 20,000 patients, each with their own distinct journey of healing, loss, and hope. One story that particularly stands out is Mary’s—a story that taught me more about the wisdom of the human heart than any medical textbook ever could.
Mary was a vibrant woman in her early sixties when I first met her. She had recently been diagnosed with advanced coronary artery blockages. “Every step is like climbing a mountain,” she said, describing the chest pain and shortness of breath she experienced with even the smallest exertion. Given the severity of her condition, I knew her healing process wouldn’t be easy, and we’d face numerous obstacles along the way.
But what struck me most about Mary was her wisdom. She was no ordinary patient. “I’ve lived a lot, Doctor. I know my body and trust its messages,” she told me confidently. It was clear that Mary had a deep understanding of herself, and she was ready to apply that knowledge to her healing.
As we began her treatment, we encountered both highs and lows: painful episodes of chest discomfort, trying various medications, and many adjustments to her lifestyle. Yet Mary always emphasized one thing: “We need a plan that suits my life, not just my heart.” She brought a unique perspective to her care that combined medical science with her own intuition.
We quickly realized that her healing journey wasn’t just about treating a physical ailment—it was about considering her life as a whole. As Mary often reminded me, “It’s about my quality of life, too.” Together, we blended medical expertise with personal wisdom, guided by both knowledge and intuition.
Our relationship transcended the typical doctor-patient dynamic. “You’re more than my doctor. You’re part of my healing,” she’d say, expressing gratitude for our bond. We celebrated victories together and supported each other through the difficult moments. I paid close attention to the emotional toll her condition took on both of us, understanding the importance of emotional steadiness in our shared journey.
This relationship, built on empathy and mutual respect, reminds me that the best healthcare is not just about medicine but also about the deeper human connection. It’s about recognizing the wisdom within each of us, in both doctors and patients, that guides us toward healing and growth.
What Is Wisdom?
Have you ever thought about what sets truly wise people apart? While knowledge is important, it’s only part of the puzzle. Wisdom isn’t the same as intelligence. It’s not just about what we know, but how we understand and navigate life’s complexities.
My search to understand wisdom led me to explore various perspectives. Through conversations with experts and research, I began to see that wisdom involves much more than accumulating knowledge.
The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy describes wisdom as being rooted in humility. It’s about accepting that life is constantly changing and knowing what we can control—and what we can’t. True wisdom, in this sense, comes from recognizing our limitations and being open to learning from others.
Psychologists Christopher Peterson and Martin Seligman also describe wisdom as one of the six core virtues for a meaningful life. They define wisdom as a combination of qualities: creativity, curiosity, sound judgment, a lifelong love of learning, and the ability to see the bigger picture.
Expanding on these concepts, researchers Thomas Meeks and Dilip Jeste have developed a model of wisdom that includes six essential components. These include self-reflection, emotional regulation, the ability to navigate uncertainty, and making wise social decisions based on empathy and perspective.
One of the most inspiring definitions of wisdom I encountered came from Chip Conley, author of Wisdom at Work and cofounder of the Modern Elder Academy. He poetically defined wisdom as “metabolized experience leading to distilled compassion.” This idea struck me deeply, suggesting that wisdom is not just about accumulating experiences, but about learning from them and using that knowledge to contribute to the greater good.
Key Elements of Wisdom
Combining these ideas, I believe wisdom involves several core elements:
- Humility – Acknowledging our limitations and remaining open to learning from others.
- Acceptance of Uncertainty – Embracing life’s ambiguities and making decisions with a nuanced understanding.
- Learning from Experience – Staying curious and using both successes and failures as opportunities for growth.
- Perspective – Seeing the bigger picture, adapting to life’s changes, and appreciating the interconnectedness of all things.
- Empathy and Compassion – Understanding and connecting with others’ emotions, and fostering kindness.
- Emotional Regulation – Managing our emotions with steadiness and calm, especially during difficult times.
- Judgment – Making decisions based on a deep understanding of both the facts and the bigger context.
Wisdom is a treasure we all can cultivate. It may evolve over time, but the pursuit of wisdom is a fundamental part of what it means to be human. When we embrace humility, learn from our experiences, and practice compassion, we enrich our lives and the lives of those around us.
Wisdom: The Harmony of the Brain, the Heart, and the Gut
“Follow your heart” is more than just a saying—it’s a vital part of wisdom. This idea, which traditionally refers to making decisions based on intuition and emotion rather than purely logic, actually has scientific backing.
Recent neuroscience has shown that wisdom involves a complex interaction between the brain, the heart, and the gut. Each of these systems plays a role in guiding us to wise decisions.
For example, the brain is essential when making moral or ethical decisions. Specific areas, like the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, help us plan and consider the consequences of our actions. Meanwhile, the anterior cingulate cortex helps mediate emotional responses and resolve conflicts within our decisions. Studies have also shown that the medial prefrontal cortex activates when we think about making generous or compassionate choices. Brain chemicals like serotonin and dopamine are crucial for managing emotions and showing empathy—both key elements of wisdom.
But the heart also plays a significant role in decision-making. Every heartbeat sends valuable information to the brain about our emotional and physical states. This communication allows us to tune in to our feelings, which can help guide us in making wise choices. Practices like mindfulness and heart-centered meditation can strengthen this connection, leading to greater emotional awareness and empathy.
Dr. Eve Ekman, a well-being expert, has helped deepen our understanding of emotional wisdom. She believes that emotional regulation—learning how to manage our feelings—is essential to wisdom. In fact, she challenges the common belief that consciousness is solely based in the brain. According to Dr. Ekman, the heart has an enormous capacity for emotional intelligence that contributes to our overall wisdom.
Finally, recent research into the gut-brain connection has revealed that our gut health also impacts our decision-making and emotional balance. The gut, sometimes known as the "second brain," sends signals to the brain that affect our emotions and guide our decisions. A healthy gut microbiome can improve mood, enhance cognitive function, and help us navigate life’s challenges more wisely.
Together, the brain, heart, and gut form a powerful system that supports our ability to make wise decisions, manage our emotions, and empathize with others. By recognizing and nurturing this interconnectedness, we can live more balanced, healthy, and fulfilling lives.
Conclusion
Wisdom is not just about accumulating knowledge; it’s about learning from life’s experiences, managing emotions, and making thoughtful decisions. By developing humility, embracing uncertainty, and cultivating empathy, we can unlock the full potential of our wisdom. And when we allow the wisdom of our brain, heart, and gut to work in harmony, we can face life’s challenges with grace, compassion, and clarity.